Negative behaviours from close people

I am living in a place with a close person (during this covid lock down) - who can tend to get stressed and give off negative vibes... ie, blaming, complaining, critisizing etc.

Sometimes even though I try to improve my vibes, the behaviour of this person (and in general negative behaviour of others too) I think is hampering with my ability to keep my positive vibes through the day. How do I stop myself from getting affected by this, or letting this affect my manifestation process?

Comments

  • Hi Dyuthi,

    Whenever I find myself around someone like this, I like to play a little game wherein I envision them saying or doing something positive/opposite. This keeps me in a different state than the other person, and also allows for a little revision of what is taking place. After a few tries, it almost always surprises me how they reflect back what I'm thinking/visualizing. :) 

    Give this person a new script and let me know how it works for you!

    -Jessica


  • I just want to add one thing here because I feel you sister! Use the bathroom as your quick breathing/centering place! Sometimes I excuse myself 3 times during a family meal to recenter! I call the bathroom "The Temple of St. John!"
  • wow, I just logged on to ask almost same question! 
    I tend to be reactive type of person most of the time so whenever such negative comments or behavior happen, there is not really enough time to envision anything or go anywhere to regain balance, I find myself feeling angry or hurt inside even if I kept calm on the outside. I usually end up doing even more meditations ro raise my vibes and frequency.. 
  • Just thought of something... why is it that our positive energy and high frequency, especially after meditation, does not transfer to the other person with the negative low frequency- as it should, but the opposite is true? 
  • This is a great question that will help everyone! First, we have to remember that there is only the Law of Attraction. There is no Law of Assertion. Energy is transferred only to that which matches it's frequency. If we are in a high frequency place feeling things like joy, appreciation, gratitude, hope, fun, etc, we can influence those around us only if they are in the range of our frequency. For example, if someone is in the range of neutrality, faith, slight irritation even, then they can fall under the higher frequency. This is because they have less resistance. If, on the other hand, someone is in the frequency range of hate, anger, fear, shame, their range is high in resistance. Influence has to do with resistance.

    Here's the real question we need ask ourselves. What is the thing I do that knocks me out of the frequency I desire? Usually it is this: We feel great, we encounter another with low vibrational frequency, we begin to notice it, focus on it. We may even become aware that we are judging it. As soon as I give my attention to it I become a match for it! The practice is to focus on what you've got going on. We can't fix others. Sometimes I like to see negative people as powerful Co-creators who are , in their negativity, asking for the solution to their problems. When we are in negativity we get clear as to what we want (consciously or not) and our asking takes place.

    The solution is to practice holding your own vibrational offering regardless of what manifestational step others are in.

    You are do a terrific job! ♥️
  • Thank you Shelia, that makes sense, I'll have to be more aware of those types of incidents from now on, I know it might be a bit of a challenge but I hope with practice I'll be able to control the situations better. 

  • You are welcome Wafa ♥️
  • Hard to admit, but my wife is my biggest critic, but she/that is also my greatest gift.  I have often tried to put myself in the mind set that she is also my greatest teacher.  I try to put myself in a air of gratitude for her because she gives me the greatest challenge. She means well, but she points out my mistakes & weaknesses.  That brings my energy, vibration, as Wafa was talking about, down.  Then I feel bad/depressed/disappointed - etc.  It's a big challenge when it's there most of the time.

    It just popped into my mind that my negative subconscious belief about myself is feeding of her comments and this just popped up, that my beliefs are causing ( law of attraction ) attracting her to say them.  So it's really myself trying to bring them to the surface............ WOW............ now how do i bring them out and change them.   this is good...... look forward to your input
  • Welcome to the forum Johnny Boy. My name is Shelia. I work for Dr. Connor as a moderator. I will help you to my fullest ability.

    First I want to say that you are in the top 99% of people in that you are doing this work. Congratulations! You have taken the biggest step already. Secondly I want to say that it is important that we insist on having fun as we practice these techniques and tools. As soon as we began to have any uncomfortable emotions, like anxiety, we take a break or move on to another exercise. Remember first and foremost that we are energy, everything is energy and we are learning to work deliberately with the laws that govern energy. Therefore we want to becoming very sensitive to our emotions (energy) in the present moment. Our power is in the present moment, the now. Whatever emotion I am feeling (vibrating) right now is the one I want to tend. Anxiety brings to me more things to be anxious about, disappointment brings to me more things to be disappointed about, etc. As we tune into the emotions in our bodies we want to constantly remind ourselves that those emotions are an indicator of our thoughts. I call them "our stories." We tell ourselves stories and those stories begin manifesting immediately into the physical in the form of an emotion. We create our emotions with our stories. No one or nothing "causes" us to feel anything. Our thoughts are the cause always and our emotions are the effect. That is very important because we have been programed to give our personal power away by seeing things/people as the "cause." We must wake up to that, that is huge! No one has the power to lower my vibration or cause me to feel bad. Now that's good news. If I am the creator of my thoughts and emotions, then I have the power to change them. This is not an overnight matter. We are here to get better and better and better. Our work is never done because we are eternal and we are learning how to use the Power that created universes. The next enormous piece we must get is that our thoughts follow our focus. What we focus upon is EVERYTHING! If I am focusing upon what is wrong, painful, hurtful, scary, sad, depressing..., then I am adding energy to those things. I am making them grow! When I train myself to focus upon what I appreciate or find pleasing then I am growing those things. Now our dominant thoughts stem straight from our beliefs. The beliefs are easy to bring into our awareness by feeling the emotion, asking yourself what story you are telling yourself and then finally, "What must I believe about myself, others, the world, etc. that would make me think that thought?" Poof! Your system of beliefs reveal themselves. It's really quite fun as the process becomes a habit.

    I hope this was helpful to you. And again, welcome! ♥️
  • edited July 2020
    I moved out of state and went back home with my boyfriend to visit our families back in Louisville, KY for the 4th of july weekend.  being back with my family i realized how much i've grown and evolved in the past 3 months being away from them. I had always had self-esteem issues since i can remember. well i sat down with my mom for her to do my nails and out of nowhere she grabs my stomach and tells me," oh you've gotten chunky." I didnt know how to react so i just looked at her and shook my head, looking back this would of been a great scenario for me to address the fact that it hurt my feelings so she's aware and doesn't do it again.MIND YOU, I've been working out consistently since the beginning of 2020, it was my new years resolution to work out 3+ days a week and be consistent with it, well i stuck to it and been consistent and I, MYSELF have seen the positive changes in my body. so when i heard this words come out of my mothers mouth, i was really hurt, and all those beliefs i had about myself creeped in & kinda messed with me. it made me question everything I've been doing to be a healthier person & was it even worth to keep going? basically questioning my new beliefs that i am actively working on. well i realized that this scenario happened for some growth to take place 1- i still need to work on my self image so nothing & no one can effect me and 2- to forgive my mother because deep down i know shes coming from a loving place, just communicating it the only way she knows how to. 3- it made me realized where i learned those beliefs about myself and it gives me the power to change it :)4- this 4th point came into realization just as i was reading this, that I need to learn how to communicate how i feel to others in a passive loving way without hurting their feelings but communicating clearly how i feel so it doesnt turn into a suppressed emotion!!!! no more suppressed emotions !!!!!!!! 
  • I'm from Louisville also. We may be related. Story sounds very familiar!
  • I love hearing how you used this experience to get more clarity. Thank you for sharing your process with us! You are amazing! ♥️
  • edited March 2021
    Thanks Everyone for sharing!  I really appreciate this stream and it is SO relevant for me right now!  It's very clear that once something grabs my attention that is negative (i.e. like someone close does something "disturbing"), my mind likes to ruminate on that.  

    But today, I tried something different, based on a discussion elsewhere in this Forum... I did free-style-expressive-writing for 20 minutes, then did my Effortless Meditated for 15 minutes.  Toward the end of my meditation, I gently repeated several times, "Everything is going to be ok... things are always working out for me... I'm always in the right place at the right time..." and other SOOTHING phrases.  It worked in seconds and it FELT soothing!  The second I let myself "ruminate" on Me-Feeling-Good, my mood switched instantly.
  • Wonderful! Thank you for sharing this experience! Isn't it so fun to become a deliberate creator!?! ♥️
  •  I Just have to say Sheila ...I Love the " Temple' of St John ...I'll giggle all day about !that!
    :))
  • We have to do whatever we have to do to take full responsibility for our vibrational frequency! We really do create our own reality! ♥️
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